This post is going to be intense. It's about a 12 year old child and his death this week.
If it's too much, please don't read on...I understand completely.
David was a friend to Kody and Kolin. He was a member of our karate school, which makes him family.
He was a great kid, a straight A student, David had a smile that lit up a room and a contagious laugh to go right along with it.
He was silly, he was friendly, he was extremely handsome.
He was Kody's age but Kolin's size...a little small for a 12 year old but he was strong, graceful and beautiful.
His name is David.
Now we call him "Angel David".
David passed away suddenly this week.
His death was unnecessary and tragic.
There are two sides to David's death, I don't know which is correct...but does it matter? I don't think so.
The first is that there is a "game" going on amongst school aged children, high school, middle school and yes, even elementary school.
This game is called "Hangman" and I imagine it is equivalent to the so called game that 20 somethings were playing at one time as to where you choke yourself to the point of passing out and then a friend brings you back before any harm is done {any harm? what are they thinking?}.
Apparently David tried this by himself, in his bedroom with a belt and a ceiling fan.
The second is what I heard from a local elementary school teacher who told me that all Lake Cty. teachers were made aware this past Monday in preparation for when the news did come out to the general public, school children especially.
David, apparently depressed or maybe mad at his own self...took his own life. It wasn't a game, it was for real.
Maybe he only wanted to cry out for attention. But, he is from a wonderful, loving family.
Maybe he just made a horrible, impulsive, decision without thinking through the consequences. Maybe he thought, as kids do, that he is invisible.
Maybe he was being bullied? Teased? Laughed at?
I don't know.
I do know that I wish my boys could have spent more time with him, more then a quick karate class and hanging out afterwards waiting for Dad or Mom to pick them up.
Maybe David would have confided in my boys who in turn would have confided in me who in turn could have placed just one phone call to his Mom. Mom to Mom.
It's too late for any of that now.
Tonight David's family will say a final good-bye before his casket is sealed forever.
Please, if you are prayers, no matter what religion you believe in, please pass on a prayer to Angel David, his Mom, Dad, sisters, family and friends.
David is at peace...his family will never be.
Thank you.
Love, Kim
8 comments:
i lost a friend to that stupid "game" in high school. ironicly his name was also david... david crowley. we called him dj.
i will never forget on november 6th when i was pulled out of my 4th period class and brought down ot the guidence office... they put me in a room with all my friends and then told us all at once.
rest in peace to both davids.
give kody and kolin a hug from me.
www.leo-mcphee.memory-of.com/
Kim, I urge you and any of your readers to please go to the above site and read it. I found it one year ago quite by accident when I was googling for events that happened on my son's birthday (the same as the boy above).
His "accident" had made the news here in Canada when it happened because there were several other incidents around the same time.
It is sad to think that this is happening out there. Just a short month ago, two boys from my son's former high school were playing the game with a blood pressure cuff around their necks. Fortunately it did not lead to death but it was discovered that the boy who had the cuff even did it when he was alone.
There are links on the above site that will give parents more info about this deadly "game" and I urge you to please sit down with your children and talk to them about it. You may be surprised what your children tell you...
My heart and prayers go out to David's family and to yours as you try to make sense of this.
Blondie
Kim,
I am so sorry to hear of David's tragic loss. How utterly horrible that your boys have had to endure losing yet another friend at such a tender age.
Several year ago, a member of my group of high school friends took his own life. Bob was 16 years old, just a bit older than David, but still a baby nonetheless. I clearly remember the pain and confusion we all felt regarding that loss. One thing that is very clear in my mind, though, was that Bob NEVER showed any signs that he was about to end his life. He was smart, outgoing, creative and always had a smile on his face. He was very, very good at hiding his pain until the day he made the tragic decision to end his life. I guess my point is that no once could have known, no one could have stopped Bob and David from doing what they did. I am sure David took joy in his friendship with Kody and Kolin.
May you all find peace.
((hugs))
Thanks for educating us on this. I heard of it years ago but kind of forgot about it since it wasn't timely for the age of our child. I have a web page that we'll use to talk to her this weekend and I shared it with my friends who have kids. I think sometimes we as parents are naive of this so aren't smart enough to know we need to share info with our kids.
Hugs to your boys and you as you deal with this loss.
Thanks again Kim!
So sorry to hear about this tragedy. Sending lots of hugs and prayers to David's family and your boys.
Kim
Awe, I'm so sorry to hear about this. How hard for David's family, and Kody & Kolin as well. I, too, had heard about this 'game' a few years ago, but had completely forgotten about it.
This is so, so sad. I too wish he had spoken to just one person for help.
We are praying for his family.
I also lost a friend named David in high school. He had stolen a bike on a dare from friends and then was afraid his girlfriend would hate him for doing it so he shot himself....over something so stupid.
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