Tuesday, April 3, 2012

If you want to know where your heart is, look where your mind wanders.

bottlebrushblooms 007 copy

It seems like forever that I have had it in me to pick up the camera, tonight I did...just by some fluke chance when I was taking out the trash and saw this little flower.

My posts have been few and far in between I know, and I apologize.
Back in December I had some surgery, it's taken a long time to recover from it and the Dr doesn't know why. Health wise, I'm falling apart it seems and I guess I can finally say getting old sucks lol.
Tomorrow I get some blood work results back that I had two weeks ago so hopefully somebody can fix me, I'm a mes...a hot mess.

Happy days come along more now, it's not that I'm ready to move on, but I am ready to smile and laugh again. I try to anyway, at least I don't fake it much any more.

Losing my husband has damaged my soul and broken my spirit...I crave the day I can be funny, be me again.
I want to find happiness again, I think it would be good for me. Unfortunately, my family here doesn't really agree.
It's a tough balance always trying to make everyone happy...I wonder if that is even possible?

Anyway, life goes on and we wake up every day...that's a good thing. Waking up alone isn't. It's my life now though, and I deal with it. I really have no choice.

Take care everyone, if you don't hear from me I'd like to take this time to wish everyone a very Happy Easter.



Anonymous said...

I agree. Getting old does suck.

I think of you often and I'm glad you're ready to sincerely laugh again!


Anonymous said...

So sorry you haven't been feeling well. I hope they are able find out what is wrong.


SamC said...

You are a beautiful woman and YOU deserve to be happy. You will never get over your husband, but, I am sure he would want you to be happy too.

SamC said...

You are a beautiful woman and you deserve to be happy. Your children will grow up and have their own lives. I know you will never get over Vinny, but, he would want you to be happy too.

Miss Judy said...

Oh Kim, I'm so glad things seem to be getting a little easier for you. I truly can't imagine what I'd do if my husband passed, and we're in our 70's. I hope someday you find someone to share the rest of your life with. Kids don't understand how hard it can be to be alone, as in without a mate. I continue to pray for your entire family.
Hugs and Blessings. Judy

jenn in az said...

Happy early Easter K family. When my mom died suddenly back in 2002 I told my stepdad I wanted him to find happiness again because everyone deserves to be happy. I know your kids will struggle with whatever you do in the future but there comes a time when you need to find your happiness. Your kids will adapt and realize that even mom deserves to be happy again. Hang in there and I can almost guarantee that one day you will find a reason to wake up with a big smile again.


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